Sunday, November 22, 2015

What is a good Tinder opening line?

I ride the train to work A LOT. I decided a good use of my time would be to re-download Tinder (for 15th time) and find my future husband. I'm 22, so obviously my ovaries are about to shrivel up and die. I need to lock down a good man on Tinder, because if you can't find a good man on Tinder, you can't find a good man any where.

As I was swiping right, I started noticing the different opening lines I would get. I have come to find that (most) men who want to get some action, end up with some AWESOME things to say.


1. Because every girl likes to be compared to coffee grounds.





















2. Oh really, that's your name? COOL. How about you copy and paste your bio too.






















Don't be like George or Warren. George and warren are boring. I like to call them Captain Obvious, and No Shit Sherlock.

3. And I feel like I should have swiped left. 

Unmatched. Unmatched in a heartbeat.

4. Even if I am wearing a onsie... There's not enough room for your two letters. Sorry, not sorry JT.



5. At least your parents will love him. Meanwhile you're stuck imagining all the practicing that went one to create your perfect self.

Because you are perfect. Lesbe honest.


6.  And now we have the golden child. He's In dental school, AND he has great ideas. Take me now.

How bout it CBS? Will you take a chance on the Tinder couple???


7. The match who has awesome connections and knows his musical history. YES PLEASE!

You'll totally get an invite to the wedding, but you won't be in the wedding.. if you're catching my drift.

8. I mean, atleast he's getting straight to the point.

I'm flattered. But no. Never. 
#ontothenext

9.  MAKE UP YOUR MIND. THEY ARE SO MANY ANALOGIES I CAN'T KEEP UP.

Because every girl loves being compared to food. Winning!

10. I actually might give him a chance because this is pretty freaking amazing.
Anyone who will put up with apple care is a keeper.





No comments:

Post a Comment